1/23/2017 - IM BORED

Everytime i think about college i think of a rose tinted campus filled with love and adventure, but my heart tells me to stop making up stories and to be more realistic. Realistically, due to the limited time spent there i doubt i will make any meaningful relationships since i will go there for one whole day of the week. Same with a job, i imagine a cute girl waiting for me to get off my break to see me again but i know thats not the life thats waiting for me. I am doomed from the start. Destined to a life consisting of one person. ひとりぼっち. there is nobody thats gonna save me and i shouldnt expect anyone to want to do so. it would be very nice for that to happen tho ne~. At the moment I am a NEET for 7 months strong now, and i feel very neutral with that fact. I watched all of the ghost in the shell stand alone complex series and it was very nice. Been playing lots of vampire savior, my bishamon is a solid 6/10 and i learned how to do AG's like a normal person. Currently trying to do a full playthrough of all the chapters of both Duke Nukem 3d and Blood, very fun but different games. The level design in both of those games is really amazing, theres always lots of set pieces and little dinky shit to mess around with. been drawing alot, nothing too fancy, a bit of porn but it always comes out mediocre so i guess its just about as good as the rest of what I draw. Been a little sad lately, not deep depression sad, but just a little blue. Thinking about the past, all the fun times gone in the wind never to be had again or lost friends/schoolmates that i've been thinking about. Why was I born to a solitary life style? i sometimes ask myself. Should I do anything to change it? i ask further. Should I get in touch with a long forgotten friend and see what they are up to? i continue to ask. If you have gotten this far without having many friends, and never looking back then you must be doing something alright. i reassure myself.